It's not uncommon to feel overwhelmed, frustrated, lost, fed up, confused, hopeless, scared, nervous, clueless and "not good enough" when we think of being a parent. It's one area of our life where we can be the most critical of ourselves. Parenting is the world's best job...and it's also the hardest.
Often times, in an effort to "get back control" of our children, we resort to behavioral strategies such as time outs, quiet spaces, removal of highly valuable toys (such as video games), grounding, withholding allowance and even threats. These are very common strategies that most adults have tried at some point or another, and at times they can work. But when used over and over, they lose their luster and begin to become ineffective. When this happens, those feelings of frustration and loss of control begin to creep in again and it can lead to very uncomfortable, and sometimes harmful, interactions between our children and ourselves. Every parent wants to know "the secret" to getting their children to "listen and obey."
This class is designed to enhance your parenting skills and introduce new ways of how to respond to challenging behavior. But, unlike other behavioral classes or strategies you may have tried (such as time outs), it is also going to enhance your ability to be more in tune with your children's emotions and understand their needs on a different level. With your continued and intentional focus on your children's emotions, you will find that over time the need for behavioral strategies will decrease.
Ultimately, what we all want is a strong and healthy relationship with our children; one that we can all enjoy and have fun with. Behavioral strategies only focus on putting out the fire after it has started; relationship-based parenting classes, like Circle of Security, focus on preventing the fire from happening.
The essential components of Circle of Security Parenting© (COS-P) include:
- 8 chapters with each session covering one chapter, which can be completed in 90 minutes in a group context, or in individual counseling.
- Each chapter on the DVD provides the theory and examples of parents interacting with their children and reflecting on the material. There are designated places to stop and engage parents in reflective dialogue regarding what has just been presented. A series of reflective questions are suggested for each designated pause.
The videos below will give you a brief overview of some of the highlights from the class. You can also visit the Circle of Security International website to learn more about the class. Included on the website is a page dedicated to published articles explaining the outcomes from research of attachment-based parenting.